Top 10 tips to make your home more equal
There is no quick-fix when it comes to creating a more equal home, but it’s always helpful to have some basic starting points to build from. In this post the ESAH team shares their tips on how to improve equality at home.
Our top 10 tips to help you create a more equal home:
Proper listening in equal measure with a genuine interest in understanding the other’s perspective.
Choose a time to discuss it together, don’t bring it up when you’re frustrated or it will probably just end up in an argument.
Embrace your differences – Some of the things that are important to you may seem unnecessary to others (especially children). Let them choose to do the tasks that they see value in and they are more likely to keep doing them.
Let it go – If you agree that a task is no longer your responsibility then you also have to accept that it may be done differently: at a different pace, on a different day, in a different way!
Put a timeframe on it – Saying that, all tasks should have a timeframe. You don’t want all the dirty dishes sitting in the sink until the weekly wash-up on Friday evening!
Put it on the fridge – Once you have decided who is responsible for what, write it down and stick it up so everyone can see.
Learn and practise tolerance – Our partners/children/others might not do as good a job as we think we do. But as long as the domestic work is being shared, we’re freed up to meet our potential.
Be willing to invest time in teaching your household members how to do something (they simply may not know how).
DON’T guilt trip them into doing it. Explain why it is important to you that they help. And praise them when they complete a task (especially little ones).
Be mindful of language that reinforces gender stereotypes and roles. e.g. ‘stop being such a girl’, ‘be a man’, ‘it’s your responsibility’ etc. Use positive and inclusive language, encourage everyone to talk about feelings (good and bad) and show emotions irrespective of gender. This also helps to identify any potential issues and improve confidence. Don’t be afraid to have honest conversations about the perceived roles within the home.
If you have any tips to share, please use the hashtag #equalitystartsathome and tag us on Twitter.